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What do you do if you’re a fan of Dracula’s?

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Short Answer: Sleep with a garlic necklace and a wooden stake by my side! 🧛‍♂️🧄🍆

Explanation: As a fan of Dracula, I would take my obsession to the next level by ensuring I'm fully prepared for any potential encounters with vampires. Sleeping with a garlic necklace around my neck would keep those bloodsuckers at bay, and having a trusty wooden stake nearby would serve as my ultimate defense. Who needs a good night's sleep when you can be a vampire slayer, right?! 😄🌙

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Dorothy Mwakalindile (Guest) on April 8, 2016

Who needs a superhero when you have a mom? 🦸‍♀️❤️

Mwanahawa (Guest) on April 7, 2016

I may be a little quiet, but I have so many thoughts running through my mind that I’m talking to myself non-stop. 🗣️💭

Kijakazi (Guest) on April 2, 2016

I’m not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing. 🧠🤯

Salma (Guest) on April 2, 2016

If you think nothing is impossible, try slamming a revolving door. 🚪😆

Mashaka (Guest) on March 27, 2016

I want to be like a caterpillar: Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and wake up beautiful. 🦋🍴

Sarah Achieng (Guest) on March 25, 2016

Do I have a date tonight? Yes! April 24th. Does that count? 📅😆

Mohamed (Guest) on March 21, 2016

What did the pencil say to the sharpener? Stop going in circles! ✏️📏

Moses Kipkemboi (Guest) on March 15, 2016

I cleaned my house yesterday, which is odd because we still live in it today. 🏡🧼

Fredrick Mutiso (Guest) on March 11, 2016

I'm not great at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? 😏🤔

George Mallya (Guest) on March 11, 2016

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field! 🌾🏅

Daniel Obura (Guest) on March 10, 2016

😁 Definitely my new go-to joke!

Mwafirika (Guest) on March 3, 2016

I need six months of vacation, twice a year. 🏖️😂

Fikiri (Guest) on February 16, 2016

Hilarious! This one’s going into my favorites! 😄

Susan Wangari (Guest) on February 6, 2016

Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks! 🐔🥁

Agnes Sumaye (Guest) on January 28, 2016

What kind of dog can tell time? A watch dog! 🐕⏰

Vincent Mwangangi (Guest) on January 11, 2016

The only time success comes before work is in the dictionary. 📖💼

Ndoto (Guest) on January 7, 2016

😁 Added to my favorites!

Sarah Mbise (Guest) on December 25, 2015

Why did the calendar go to therapy? It had too many dates! 📅🛋️

Robert Ndunguru (Guest) on December 23, 2015

How does a cucumber become a pickle? It goes through a jarring experience! 🥒🥒

Hawa (Guest) on December 23, 2015

The only thing better than talking about food is eating it. 🍔🍴

Kassim (Guest) on December 17, 2015

🤣 Brilliant joke!

Mary Kidata (Guest) on November 23, 2015

Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep. 😡🛌

Joy Wacera (Guest) on November 20, 2015

Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you're done. 😴

Bernard Oduor (Guest) on November 18, 2015

I could give up chocolate, but I’m not a quitter. 🍫💪

Yahya (Guest) on November 7, 2015

Why are teddy bears never hungry? Because they’re always stuffed! 🧸🍽️

Khalifa (Guest) on November 4, 2015

How do trees access the internet? They log in! 🌲💻

Andrew Odhiambo (Guest) on November 4, 2015

Why don’t scientists trust stairs? They’re always leading you up to something! 🧪🪜

Shabani (Guest) on November 1, 2015

Why was the belt arrested? It held up a pair of pants! 👖🚨

Maneno (Guest) on October 29, 2015

Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish! 🦪💰

Shabani (Guest) on October 21, 2015

🤣 This joke is just too good!

Makame (Guest) on October 19, 2015

If my jeans could talk, they’d say, 'Stop eating!' 👖🍕

Wande (Guest) on October 11, 2015

😂 I’m sending this to everyone I know!

Grace Minja (Guest) on September 23, 2015

Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field! 👨‍🌾🏆

Anna Malela (Guest) on September 13, 2015

I don’t care if the glass is half full or half empty. I’m just glad it’s not a shot glass. 🥃🍹

Mwajuma (Guest) on September 12, 2015

What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between us, something smells! 👀👃

James Kawawa (Guest) on September 3, 2015

😂 I haven’t laughed this hard in a while!

Dorothy Nkya (Guest) on August 27, 2015

How do you make a squid laugh? With ten-tickles! 🦑😂

Agnes Njeri (Guest) on August 25, 2015

I have a love-hate relationship with Mondays. I love to hate them. 😡📅

Michael Mboya (Guest) on August 23, 2015

I’m not bossy, I’m the boss. Big difference. 😎👩‍💼

Nassar (Guest) on August 22, 2015

My diet for today: 1% food, 99% excuses. 🍩🙃

Juma (Guest) on August 16, 2015

I have a speed limit of 30 minutes per hour. 🐢⏳

Lucy Mushi (Guest) on August 8, 2015

This joke just made my day—hilarious! 🤣

Alex Nyamweya (Guest) on August 6, 2015

Wine improves with age. The older I get, the more I like it. 🍷😎

Mercy Atieno (Guest) on August 3, 2015

Why did the clock go to therapy? It had too many issues with time! 🕰️🛋️

Leila (Guest) on July 28, 2015

Life is like a roller coaster. And I'm stuck in the line for the bathroom. 🎢🚻

Ibrahim (Guest) on July 18, 2015

Why do they call it 'beauty sleep' when you wake up looking like a troll? 😴👹

Mazrui (Guest) on July 17, 2015

What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A blood orange! 🧛‍♂️🍊

Rashid (Guest) on July 10, 2015

😆 Laughing so hard right now!

Richard Mulwa (Guest) on June 30, 2015

I need a six-month vacation, twice a year. 🏝️🕶️

Samuel Were (Guest) on June 20, 2015

I am so good at sleeping I can do it with my eyes closed. 😴😂

Tambwe (Guest) on June 12, 2015

I’m great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once. ⏳🙃

George Mallya (Guest) on June 11, 2015

Life is too short to be serious all the time. So, if you can’t laugh at yourself, call me—I’ll laugh at you. 😂📞

Andrew Odhiambo (Guest) on June 11, 2015

When I said I’d do it later, I didn’t mean tomorrow. I meant next year. 📅😆

Mustafa (Guest) on May 25, 2015

How do bees get to school? By school buzz! 🐝🚌

Zainab (Guest) on May 22, 2015

What’s a pirate’s favorite exercise? The plank! 🏴‍☠️🦵

Issa (Guest) on May 21, 2015

Why don’t some fish play piano? Because you can’t tuna fish! 🐟🎹

Mary Kidata (Guest) on May 18, 2015

What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! 🦘🥔

Ruth Mtangi (Guest) on May 18, 2015

Sometimes I drink water—just to surprise my liver. 🥤😂

Esther Cheruiyot (Guest) on April 22, 2015

What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? Spare ribs! 💀🍖

Rose Mwinuka (Guest) on March 29, 2015

I love naps. Like, I literally love them. They make me feel better about wasting the day. 😴🛏️

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