| If a butcher wears a size XL shirt and a size 13 shoe, what does he weigh? |
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| What often falls in winter, but never gets hurt? |
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| Why couldn’t the boy go to the pirate movie? |
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| What is a math teacher’s favorite type of dessert? |
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| What is Dracula’s favorite fruit? |
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| What does Santa clean his sleigh with? |
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| Why didn’t the oven go to college? |
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| Why don’t ducks tell jokes when they fly? |
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| What’s a bat’s favorite pastime? |
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| What did the squirrel give for Valentine’s Day? |
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| What did the turkey stay before it was roasted? |
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| How do you catch an unusual rabbit? |
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| What do you get if you cross a pine tree with an apple? |
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| Which bus crossed the ocean? |
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| Why do Marxists like fruit infusions? |
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| What did the snowman order at Wendy’s®? |
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| Where do cows go on the weekend? |
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| Why did the book join the police force? |
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| Why should you never iron a four leaf clover? |
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| Where did the witch have to go when she misbehaved? |
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| What type of key is the most important at Thanksgiving dinner? |
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| Why do eggs hate jokes? |
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| Best Monster Dance Partner: The Boogie-Monster!
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| What kind of weather does a turkey like? |
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| Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up? |
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| What do you call a teacher with no arms, no legs, and no body? |
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| What would you get if you crossed a teacher with a vampire? |
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| What did one piece of string say to the other piece of string? |
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| Why did the girl put lipstick on her head? |
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| What runs but never walks? |
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| Why did the dog keep tripping? |
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| What do birds do on Halloween? |
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| What’s a cat’s favorite nursery rhyme? |
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| What has an eye, but cannot see? |
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| Where did the king keep his army? |
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| Why did the skeleton cross the road? |
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| What do gymnasts, acrobats, and bananas all have in common? |
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| How do you catch a polar bear? |
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| What do witches order at hotels? |
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| Why did the man take his clock to the vet? |
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| What did the farmer give his wife for Valentine’s Day? |
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| Why is it not a good idea to try to trick a snake? |
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| What’s a rabbit’s favorite kind of music? |
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| What’s a ghost’s favorite room in the house? |
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| What did the stamp say to the envelope? |
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| Which monster is the best dance partner? |
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| What do you give a sick lemon? |
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| What do you do if you’re a fan of Dracula’s? |
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| Why did the Cyclops stop teaching? |
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| Which is faster, heat or cold? |
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